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I will not bend to you.I will not be the one to waver this time.
Although my strength will not last long,
and I will eventually break,
I will not bend to you.
I will do what is right this time.
The proper way.
And only then will I come to you
but not for forgiveness,
because I did nothing wrong.
I will come to you to see if our friendship is as true as you say it is.
If it is, then we have no problem,
but if it's not then I will not apologise.
I will not beg.
I have my family here for me
for when it does hit me,
and even if we are friends still, I will not come to you for help.
My family have been at my back since it began.
They will be my rock.
Go AwayIt wont stop.
Why wont it stop?
I thought things were supposed to get better.
But it still hurts.
More for me to destroy.
I can't stop.
I don't mean to be this way.
I tried to get better.
But I'm still hurting you.
Run while you still can.
It hurts so bad
Right in my heart.
But I will smile for you.
Because you are happy.
Finally you are happy again.
Home.It's a lingering feeling on the egde of my memory, about to tip and be lost forever.
I don't want it to go, but I can't quite catch it.
I have no sense of belonging.
Maybe if I vanished for a long time, then came back, everything would be right again.
No one would remember me and I would be able to start again.
Start all over.
Yeah, I'd like that.
Be able to build my home from scratch.
The place that I would belong.
Instead of it lying, crumbled and broken around me.
I just want to go home.
I don't know where it is anymore.
I just want to belong.
MotherThe most heart wrenching thing in the world.
Is hearing someone cry, with all their heart, for their mother.
But what's worse is when you know,
their mother can never call back their name.
That she'll never be there to hold their hand.
Wipe their tears.
Or whisper "I love you" as they fall asleep.
Rikku Meme1) Choose one of your own characters (OC).
2) Make them answer the following questions.
3) Then tag three people.
4) Feel free to add some questions of your own.
1) What gender are you?
Rikku: Female. Duh.
2) What is your age?
3) Do you want a hug?
Rikku: Come near me and I'll shoot yer face off.
4) Do you have any bad habits?
Rikku: Shooting people and drinking too much. And speeding.
5) What is your favorite food?
Rikku: Apples. Or pizza. Either or. Never mixed. Ew.
6) What is your favorite ice-cream flavor?
7) Are you a virgin?
Rikku: I'm not allowed to answer that one, my sister will kill me.
8) Have you killed anyone?
Rikku: Who hasn't?
9) Do you hate anyone?
Rikku: I dislike Scarlet. She does my tits in. And Jake. And Bill.
10) Do you have any secrets?
11) What is your favorite season?
Rikku: Summer, I can work on my bike all day.
12) Who is your best friend(s)?
Rikku: I'm not sure.. Does Nightingale count? Or Tequilakage. My drinking bu
I am a turtleI am a turtle
with the waters of hope
to keep me alive
and hardened to the touch
to protect a soft core.
I am a turtle
wrinkled, wrangled and dry
with a home on my back
and the world before my eyes
slowly growing nearer.
Lipstick Stained KissesMy best friend used to tell me
"Leslie Dianne, I love you and I hate you
all in the same breath."
I didn't understand what he meant.
So I shut him up with lipstick stained kisses
that tasted like my last cigarette.
He was the first boy I ever loved.
Since we were children we made blanket forts,
we played outside and counted the stars.
We both had troubled childhoods.
Left with the bitterness of abandonment, and the memories of verbal abuse
we looked in all the wrong places for love and comfort.
I was 14 years old when I learned that happiness is found at the bottom of a bottle.
Instead of making blanket forts we poured shots.
Slippery nipples, kamikaze's, Irish car bombs, liquid cocaine, screaming orgasms, tequila slammers, you name it me poured that shit and let me tell you,
I can slam down shots like I slam fucking poetry.
but now instead of playing outside we played with each other, no longer able to count the stars because we couldn't see past our blurry double vision, sky in a haz
Shattered StarsBroken glass shines under streetlamps like glittering stars,
Like distant lights from far away,
Pulled from their seat in the heavens,
What force could of pulled these stars from their places?
Razor sharp beauty, glittering like forsaken diamonds,
Dashed apon the ground.
Refracted a thousand times,
In the tiny mirrors,
Each with it's own reflection,
A thousand copies of me in the glass.
As I leave, the shards twinkle behind me.
Shattered stars smashed apon the concrete.
The ButterflyA wonder of colors,
Sprawled on delicate wings.
Awe struck glances,
At the most complicated simple things.
Inspiring and glorious,
Charming and enchanted.
Ducking and diving,
Even flying slanted.
Bursts of yellow,
Flashes of blue,
Flares of orange,
They glimmer and shine every color hue.
So small and tender,
So shy and free.
Floating along in the breeze,
Just as happy as can be.
People overlook them,
Pass them by.
But some people appreciate these majestic creatures,
And help the ones who are broken fly.
There's not a moment more precious,
Then when one lands upon your finger.
You fill with pride and joy,
Feeling the trust linger.
Hold them gently,
Let them fly.
Observe them carefully,
And learn the regal ways of the butterfly.
Not AshamedI have become one of those girls who now has to wear a bra under her bathing suit
I thought I would stay a happy size D but now its closer to E
God . . . what did I do to deserve these
Not that I'm complaining, it gave you a reason to look at me
But how is that fair when I am so much more
Sir I speak Spanish, go to college, turn my words into music that dances off my tongue like the belly dancers of India or an exotic Salsa of my syllables
I am that 'wifey' material that every guy claims to want, yet all I get asked for are my digits
A hit it and quit it
Men wonder why I say NO
It is because I could tell your intent the moment your gaze went south and lingered there longer than on my luscious curls, my fierce eyes, or even the sassy mouth that rejects you
I would much rather be called a prude then diminish my shine for a brief moment with you
Now some say I should cover them up or put them away
Would you shun a tiger for her stripes or a lion for his mane?
Why should I have to hide or
Does not see
One that lingers
On your lips as
You get drunk on the
Ghost of her
Fleeting presence, her
Faded footsteps are like
Thunder in your chaotic mind
Does not hear
The inebriated slurs in your
Voice, they are the
Bridges connecting the
Notes of another
Mellifluous cacophony that
Sounded better in your
Head but when
You get drunk you
Tend to forget such things
Does not feel
Heart, it is pumping
Blood with enough
Through it to
Knock you dead, but you
Are too busy showing
Off your best dance moves,
You don't even care
Does not care
About whether or
Not you will be
Sober enough to get
Yourself home the next
Morning, she is
Not your designated
Driver, she always
Leaves before the
Night is over,
She always leaves
Does not know
You have no
Choice but to
A Noble WarHow noble and proud the government's must be,
to stick to there principles as the innocents flee.
How stedfast and honourable dispite the misery they cause,
to see such suffering yet carry on without pause.
How brave and courageous as there missiles fly,
to stick to there guns as children die.
How righteous and happy there ghosts must be,
to haunt the rubble in there land's of the free.
Unscripted PoemI tread the stairs of Heaven boldly,
Bright and furious, my stars shine on.
Shirk I not, the call of duty,
Brightest blood, in battle splashed,
My armor rings with purpose.
Twilight wanes, the grasp of night,
my eternal embrace in Glory.
Light calls to me, I will away,
my reward secured and rightly.
In Love With Others MadnessEvery night and everyday i help those who need a hand.
Some nights only one asks for help
Some nights no one asks for help
And on nights like tonight,
Im grateful to suffer this cursid insomnia
I deal with one, and then another comes along,
Again and again,
All night long,
This task of hearing people's cries,
And hearing the stories of their pleading souls
Should be torture to my ears
It's pure, unadulterated bliss
It relaxes me like no book ever could
It was once a task that maddened me
But now im driven insane without it...
Killing me.I've felt heart break before.
There's so many different kinds.
When someone close dies.
It's like a part of you dies with them.
When a friend walks out of your life.
It's like a part of you left with them.
But the worst kind I've ever felt.
Is watching you with them.
I get it though.
I don't love me.
And that's how I understand why you don't either.
Keep in Touch!