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I will not bend to you.I will not be the one to waver this time.
Although my strength will not last long,
and I will eventually break,
I will not bend to you.
I will do what is right this time.
The proper way.
And only then will I come to you
but not for forgiveness,
because I did nothing wrong.
I will come to you to see if our friendship is as true as you say it is.
If it is, then we have no problem,
but if it's not then I will not apologise.
I will not beg.
I have my family here for me
for when it does hit me,
and even if we are friends still, I will not come to you for help.
My family have been at my back since it began.
They will be my rock.
Go AwayIt wont stop.
Why wont it stop?
I thought things were supposed to get better.
But it still hurts.
More for me to destroy.
I can't stop.
I don't mean to be this way.
I tried to get better.
But I'm still hurting you.
Run while you still can.
It hurts so bad
Right in my heart.
But I will smile for you.
Because you are happy.
Finally you are happy again.
Home.It's a lingering feeling on the egde of my memory, about to tip and be lost forever.
I don't want it to go, but I can't quite catch it.
I have no sense of belonging.
Maybe if I vanished for a long time, then came back, everything would be right again.
No one would remember me and I would be able to start again.
Start all over.
Yeah, I'd like that.
Be able to build my home from scratch.
The place that I would belong.
Instead of it lying, crumbled and broken around me.
I just want to go home.
I don't know where it is anymore.
I just want to belong.
MotherThe most heart wrenching thing in the world.
Is hearing someone cry, with all their heart, for their mother.
But what's worse is when you know,
their mother can never call back their name.
That she'll never be there to hold their hand.
Wipe their tears.
Or whisper "I love you" as they fall asleep.
Rikku Meme1) Choose one of your own characters (OC).
2) Make them answer the following questions.
3) Then tag three people.
4) Feel free to add some questions of your own.
1) What gender are you?
Rikku: Female. Duh.
2) What is your age?
3) Do you want a hug?
Rikku: Come near me and I'll shoot yer face off.
4) Do you have any bad habits?
Rikku: Shooting people and drinking too much. And speeding.
5) What is your favorite food?
Rikku: Apples. Or pizza. Either or. Never mixed. Ew.
6) What is your favorite ice-cream flavor?
7) Are you a virgin?
Rikku: I'm not allowed to answer that one, my sister will kill me.
8) Have you killed anyone?
Rikku: Who hasn't?
9) Do you hate anyone?
Rikku: I dislike Scarlet. She does my tits in. And Jake. And Bill.
10) Do you have any secrets?
11) What is your favorite season?
Rikku: Summer, I can work on my bike all day.
12) Who is your best friend(s)?
Rikku: I'm not sure.. Does Nightingale count? Or Tequilakage. My drinking bu
The Things I've LostI lost my sight
In a world
Of ephemeral light
Hiding a sea of glass
Which I willfully dived into
In the hopes to grab the stars
Reflected in those mirrors.
I lost my heart
In a fantasy
Of perfected eternity
Guising the struggles and pain
Which are wrought
From such delusion
Of true hardened love.
I lost my soul
In a frozen hell
I've lost the right to leave.
My demons tie me down
And I hold them close
For they're the only things
Which bring me warmth.
And I live
In this silent torture
Of my own selfish design
In the hopes
These things I've lost
Will one day be returned to me.
This Is Not A PrayerGod
I write this to you,
This is not a prayer
Not such an inconsequential waste of air,
I can hardly breathe
From on all the prayers
Wasted on your ears,
From how long I've knelt at your feet.
This is a letter
Sent from a grieving sinner
Whilst still clutching the hand
You stole from him
Two hands ,in fact,
One so small
I hardly noticed
When it ceased clutching me.
I write this to ask
Not to pray
As prayers seem to have no worth to you
Surely not mine at least.
I ask only
That you return them to me.
Let me clutch these hands
Till they might return my grasp.
Because as I am right now
I doubt, I could ever let them go.
I write this
Not to pray but to beg
Give them back to me.
Give them back.
I can't let them go.
apollo, i am not for salestitch a pitch perfect sonnet of
into the infinity
of my ear canal. i
have a storm inside
me but no beaufort
scale, oh how i beg
to be impaled
with less appreciation
conviction; i am no
land and you
are a bulimic seeking
from the twenty one guns
at my unseen funeral.
only hope and Hecuba. feast
on my peace with me.
on my sermons
of affection, the ones
branded into my
chest with the sizzle
of experience. feast on my
numbness and this
raffleticket roll you received
and second-third-seventieth thoughts,
of exhuming my heart
and taping it back
into my spine.
(perhaps with a softer
tenant inside, from
each of my vertebrae
will come a spine that will not -
cannot - break)
feast on this hidden
feast on my will to
take all the things
you can only
you must give
back to me
of my civil war;
and mine. perhaps
someday you may
16 yearsDear Mom and Dad…
For 16 years, you took care of me.
For 16 years, you fed me and treated me with love, care and kindness.
For 16 years, you listened to whatever was on my mind.
For 16 years, you helped me through the rough times, and showed me the brighter side of life.
For 16 years, you still kept me, even if I was different and not like other kids.
For 16 years, we had arguments that were later solved with apologies, hugs and kisses.
For 16 years, you taught me how to always be nice to people, even if they weren’t nice back.
For 16 years, you spent your hard-earned money on gifts for me and my big brother.
And that is the reason…
Why I love you…
I love Mom and Dad…
I hope you never EVER leave me…
I'm having a bad day, I'm having a bad few years
inside I'm shouting loud but no one hears
I'm dying to tell you - can't you see
that all this anger is killing me
but it's a waste of breath
I give in - pain is all I have left
driven by revenge I want nothing but death
in life makes me think you are like the rest
my heart is bleeding in my chest
And no one notices in my case
so I pull away to a quiet place
'cause I'm tired of looking alright
I'm tired of smiling and saying I'm fine
Will you stand by my side?
with who are you allied?
'cause I wanna heal and be myself
I don't wanna feel like someone else
But I'm slowly fading
consumed by emotions - they've taken
the best of me, and happiness has forsaken
my dreams, my heart
it's taken my spark
cold and dark
trying to leave behind the past
I'm searching for an end
I hold out my hands - I'm not going to pretend
that life is easy
I'm hurting every day believe me!
Do not love me because you doDo not love me because I'm pretty
Do not love me because I'm single
Do not love me because I'm easy
Do not love me based on love at first sight
Do not think you know me so well
Love me for myself
Stay with me if you think I'm worth your time
Cuddle with me when I'm scared to lose you
Fight for me when I silent myself
Care less when I show my disgusting self
Act strange and weird with me
Be silly when I need a laugh
Do whatever you can to prove yourself
Just do not love me because I'm pretty
Passage of the Years Dear Titanic, beautiful sister of mine,
I can barely believe it. Today marks the one-hundred and second year you have been the unwilling patron of the sandy sea-floor. One-hundred and two years.... What is it like? It must be so very dark. So very cold. So very lonely... I cannot even imagine how lonely you are. There is no one to keep you company. No one except the 1,500 souls that died with you, that is. Do you still hear their voices echoing within your halls? Do you still hear the disconnected laughter that only spirits of the dead can provide? What is it like? You are falling apart more and more. The sickle of time is having her way
Oh the things I wishStress
Run away to Neverland I must
Free from horror
Free from hell
Free from the devils
Oh the things I wish
A throne of my own
Peaceful music played in the air
Live like a king
Just for the day
I AmI am a square peg, in a world of only round holes.
I am out of place everywhere, at home nowhere.
I am a white rose growing on a bush of pink.
I am the fear everyone feels in the dark.
I am quartz among glass, yet glass among diamonds.
I am an empty bottle of ink to a new quill.
I am a penny, forgotten on the street, walked over.
I am a king to no people, a god to a non-believer.
I am fire to a flood, a single match to an iceberg.
I am the best I can be, but zero times anything is still zero.
I am that, and never more.
Killing me.I've felt heart break before.
There's so many different kinds.
When someone close dies.
It's like a part of you dies with them.
When a friend walks out of your life.
It's like a part of you left with them.
But the worst kind I've ever felt.
Is watching you with them.
I get it though.
I don't love me.
And that's how I understand why you don't either.
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Bluefley has a gallery filled with artwork that whisks you off in to a Sci-fi daydream, and keeps you captivated for hours. Marc has been a member of our community for over a decade and has achieved nothing but success with his astounding commitment to interacting with the community, sharing a prolific amount of video tutorials and generally being an all round rockstar deviant. It is no joke that we are absolutely delighted to award the Deviousness Award for April 2014 to ... Read More